This is more just for my own info......because you know.....I CRS....ever and I hate to keep asking over and over.
A while back you were cited for a probation violation for drinking a sip of wine. Sounds crazy.....but when they say NO alcohol...they mean....no alcohol.....and even though you should have and could have lied on your polygraph test....you didn't.....and you admitted to taking a SIP of wine.....and that is how you got cited.....even though if you would have lied....lying on a polygraph is NOT a probation violation and they couldn't have done anything about that....you told the truth and now your.... crazy....out to get you probation officer wants you to serve 90 days for it....even though it has no relation to your crime and you do not have a alcohol problem or addiction....
You got a lawyer...held off your court date as long as you could....but ended up going to court last Wednesday.....Dec 12th....and they restarted your probation for 3 years....and you have to serve weekends in jail for 40 days. Five months....starting this weekend...go in Friday nights and get out Sunday nights...
I don't live too far from the jail Sweetie.....so hopefully I can get to you a few nights before you go in.....or meet you when you get out....hopefully.
It was good to see you Thurs night and finally give you your B-day gift....i hope you liked it.
I wish I wish I wish I could be with you right now.....I wish I could serve those 40 days with you....I would check into jail with you every friday night to spend the weekend with you in a cell like it was a Jamaican cruse.....I would do anything to be there with you.
You are there right now.....and I hope you're thinking about me as much as I am about you my love.....I love you.....
Three years....I wonder where we'll be in three years.....hopefully snowmobiling somewhere together.

....and I am once again reminded why I am still here. When two souls connect like mine and my lover it is just right. Looking into his eyes tonight.....for that moment that seemed to last for a eternity.....is something I will never forget. The tastes.....and the smells......so sweet....I can't imagine anything better. I would do anything for just one more touch....one more kiss from his lips....one more moment with his skin against mine.
My wishes have all been granted.....my dreams have all come true....and now I wish and dream for a life with my love.....and I will wait....as long as it takes....14 years.....8 years....2 years....1 year.....6 months....two months....6 weeks....my lover....I will wait as long as it takes.....I have tasted the fruit and I am not afraid....I am naked for all to see......and I am content.
I would like another taste of that fruit sometime soon though....

....is in the pudding....
Finally....we connect and talk on the phone forever.....*sigh*...you know...it is this that keeps me going....and gives me hope for the future. I want to see you....I need to see you....it's been too long.
I told you I want to see you before your birthday......before the end of this month....I love you baby.
I'm still here!!!!

....that I spend without you.....is Hell. It hurts. I have a huge hole in my life and there is no one or anything that can ever fill it but you. I'm not sure yet how I am going to get through this part of my life. But somehow the hours keep passing....and with each one I am hoping they will bring me closer to the time we can spend together.
You are not being fair to me right now....keeping your distance...not answering my calls. I need to know how you are....and whats happening....what you think and how you feel. It's hard to keep my sanity. I miss you.

Fall is my favorite time of year....and it's here...wish I could see you....(smell you touch you taste you etc...)and spend some time with you...I miss you and love you and think about you every minute of every day....I hope you are well wherever you are.....peace and love to you...